Tuesday, September 2, 2014

Real E-Mails from Real Subscribers

  • image004Was it unkind to mock our Disingenuous DemocRATS on Labor Day by reminding people how many Americans had lost their jobs during the Obama Administration? —Compassionate Conservatives
  • Does anybody find it ironic that our office was closed yesterday, when so many of those people whose unemployment has run out are still looking for work? —Obama Supporters at the Unemployment Office, Who Got the Day Off With Pay
  • Here’s our choice for today: it’s Harry S. Truman “It’s a recession when your neighbor loses his job; it’s a depression when you lose your own.” —Your Quote for Today Committee
  • This Labor Day, we’re pledging to Extends Worker Protection to Illegal Aliens. —Obama’s Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC)
  • This Labor Day, did everybody see where the Washington Post listed my campaign as the third most disastrous campaign of 2014 so far, right behind #2 Matt Bevin in Kentucky? —Doomed DemocRAT Ohio Gubernatorial Candidate Ed Fitzgerald
  • CaptureEvery year on Labor Day, I pose for a picture with some Black Union Guys. —Ohio Governor Kasich-Taylor
  • As head of the Ohio Legislative Black Caucus, this Labor Day it’s my job to turn that shooting by police of a Fairfield man at a Walmart into another Ferguson Race Riot we can use to get Black people to vote this year. —Stevecia Reece
  • What do I usually do on Labor Day? As little as possible, just like every day! —Overheard Often at the Coney Island Union Day Picnic
  • image007On Labor Day, somebody needs to say something nice about all those working women. —Brad Wenstrup
  • You know what I love, paying union dues just so I can keep my job. —Nancy in Norwood
  • I think it’s really great my union dues are going to politicians I don’t even like. —Dan in Delhi
  • I really like how unions discriminate against minorities. —Rashid in Roselawn
  • Nothing makes me feel better than knowing I’m supporting their fat cat life styles. —Wanda in Westwood 
  • The previous four e-mails would make a great Union Day commercial. —The Center for Union Facts
  • On June 28, 1894, President Grover Cleveland signed legislation that had been rushed through Congress, declaring Labor Day a national holiday, to be observed the first Monday in September Hurley the Historian
  • For Labor Day, we liked David Letterman’s “It’s Labor Day weekend. Labor Day, of course, is a holiday where people take three days off from being unemployed.” —Our Late Night Jokewatcher
  • Cartoonist Gary Varvel: The current American employment cycleDid I win the Labor Day “Liberals Say the Stupidest Things” Award for saying unions because built the middle class, which is still shrinking? —Obama’s Doofus Vice President Joe Biden 
  • Amazingly, that was the headline on Monday’s Labor Day Liberal Agenda Guest Column on our Idiotorial Page. —Feckless Fishwrappers
  • We really liked Obama’s Labor Day Message: “There are reasons to feel good about the direction that we’re headed.”Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put Obama In The White House—Twice
  • image010At Monday’s big Union Day Picnic, members of the Cincinnati Organized and Dedicated Employees Union signed a Happy Labor Day card for Diana Frey, who couldn’t attend because she’s not scheduled for release from Alderson Federal Prison in West Virginia until March 20, 2015 for embezzling more than $750,000 of their funds.—Demo-Labor Party Boss Tim Burka
  • Instead of “Crooked Union Bosses, #2 on yesterday’s Top Ten List of thetopten blessings brought to you by organized labor should have ended with “like our very own FOP police union LODGE #69 president Kathy Harrell.” —Your FOP Snitch
  • image011The Hamilton County Demo-Labor Party is so out-of-touch with reality, they seem to believe running as a Republican and claiming to have an epiphany qualifies you to run as a solid DemocRAT candidate. —Disgruntled DemocRATS
  • The party here holds no beliefs and subscribes to no positions. As long as you have money and are willing to run under the banner, you’ll be endorsed. That is, unless you actually DO subscribe to typical DemocRAT beliefs! In that case, you’re considered suspect. Consider Fred Kundrata, who ran for Congress as a Republican in 2012 and is anti-labor. — Defeated DemocRAT Congressional Candidates Jim Prues and Jeff Sinnard
  • image012Or consider Cincinnati’s Midget Mayor John Cranley, who’s crossed labor at every opportunity but still claims to be a Dem (probably because the Repubs don’t want him). No one who knows him thinks he’s a DemocRAT, including the DemocRAT City Clownuncil members who refuse to caucus with him. He’s as Republican as Steve Chabot, but for some warped reason runs as a D-RAT. —Your City Hall Snitch
  • If the Labor movement had any clout these days, none of those people would be welcomed at the big Labor Day blast at Coney Island, but both will likely be present, shaking hands and peddling their crap. —Unemployed Union Members
  • image013Does anybody else find it somewhat ironic that Labor Day was the “unofficial end” of another Obama “Summer of Recovery?” —Bluegrass Bureau Chief Ken CamBoo
  • On Labor Day I’m claiming Bitch McConnell opposes even letting minimum wage increases, unemployment benefits, gender pay equity and student-loan relief come to a vote. He favors tax breaks for companies that ship jobs overseas. He takes his stand with billionaires against the people of Kentucky. —Ditzy DemocRAT U.S. Senate Candidate Alison Wondergams Grimes
  • image014What happened? Nobody entered this year’s WEBN’s “Jump Off the Bridge” Contest at RiverfestThe Coast Guard
  • Who said you couldn’t smuggle weed into Riverfest? —Loony Libertarian Jim Berns
  • Many people say Riverfest will never be the same without beer. But for those who find old habits hard to break, you can always stick your fingers down your throats. College Kids from NKU
  • The only people in Northern Kentucky not complaining about the Riverfest beer ban are owners of Riverboat restaurants that are still open, where a beer will cost about $12. And don’t forget to leave a tip that owners can skim. —Jeff Ruby
  • image016Now that folks have finally accepted the concept of an alcohol-free Riverfest, how about having a litter free event?   Newport Trash Collectors
  • If Riverfest was such a family event, why’d all those guys at Riverfront restaurants encouraging women not in it for the publicity passing by in boats to show their big beautiful breasts? Phil Burr-ass
  • We spent Labor Day at the soccer fields on Kellogg Avenue instead of going to the the union gathering at Coney Island. Our construction jobs pay minimum wage and we don’t have to pay into Social Security or pay union dues. —Moises, Julio, Alfredo, and Jose 
  • We have also agreed that once the economy improves they will also be allowed to cook their burritos in their 23-seat van instead of staying on the roof at lunch time. —Northern Kentucky Homebuilders Association  
  • Don’t forget— you’re not supposed to wear your white bikini after Labor Day. —Miss Vicki  
  • And don’t forget to come see my number officially retired at tonight’s Florence Freedom game. —Pete Rose
  • image013Did you notice that you could see the fireworks from the Kentucky side of the river too? —Trish the Dish on Channel 19 News

image023Remember: We never print all the bad stuff we know and certain people ought to be damn glad we don’t, especially Fred Kundrata (who only got 3% of the vote running against “Bronze Star” Brad Wenstrup as a Republican in Ohio’s Second Congressional District in 2012)


More Conservative Labor Day Cartoons   

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Whistleblower Official Weekly Disclaimer

        image019Sometimes The Blower ridicules Unions to show that spending members dues to support politicians they don’t endorse is not acceptable in our society. This should be clear to anybody who isn’t a Union Boss.

          This publication is a work of fiction. Any similarity to persons living or dead without satirical intent is purely coincidental, especially Hamilton County Demo-Labor Party Boss Tim Burka.


MORE UNION MOCKERY HOT LINE

e-mail your deserved derision today.

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Some scab items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally scabby subscribers


WHISTLEBLOWER VIDEO OF THE DAY

I Wanna Be A Union Boss Game!

image022(Sent in by the Center for Union Facts, a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization that fights for transparency and accountability in America’s labor movement. For too long, big unions have opposed employee rights, engaged in self-dealing and corruption, and made excessive demands that have killed tens of thousands of jobs and driven major cities into bankruptcy.

image023Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.


Current Whistleblower Policies and Disclaimers can be found here

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MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 1, 2014

Top Ten List

Today it’s the top ten blessings brought to you by organized labor:

image04410. A three-day Union Day weekend not featuring Obama, Obama’s Doofus Vice President Joe Biden, or Obama‘s Ineffectual Secretary of Labor Thomas E. Perez, trying to explain why union members should still support ObamaCare, along with Obama’s latest jobs strategy to put more people out of work along with more pro-union regulations.
9. Schools that just can’t suck enough
8. Advances in reconstructive kneecap surgery
7. Lying ads to smear Republicans
6. Union labels
5. Part-time workers trying to make SUV payments on $55-a- week strike pay
4. Aiding Devious DemocRATS with more election fraud again in 2014
3. Coffee breaks
2. Crooked Union Bosses
…And the number one blessing brought to you by organized labor is: plenty of volunteers to write hate mail letters and tear down Conservative candidates’ yard signs.


Union Day Message

By Gomper Samuels, Deceased Former Union Leader

image007As you enjoy your paid holiday today, please try to remember one thing: it would never have been possible without the sacrifice and dedication of union leaders throughout history to make life better for average hard-working people– to end child labor, set minimum wage standards, bring safety to the workplace, a 40-hour work week, and get as many Disingenuous DemocRATS elected to political office as possible.

And if some dishonest public employee union leaders in Cincinnati just happen to be lining their own pockets, you really shouldn’t say anything about it, because, believe me, we know who you are, and we know where you live.


Union Day Message

image009Hurley the Historian says on this date in 1944, Navy aviator George H.W. Bush and his squadron were hit by Japanese anti-aircraft guns and Bush was forced to bail out of his plane over the ocean, where he was picked up by a U.S. submarine. Do you think any of our Kneepad Liberals in the Press will forget to mention that? Not that any of our Dumbed-Down, Self-Absorbed, Media-Influenced, Celebrity-Obsessed, Politically-Correct, Uninformed, Short-Attention-Span, Free-Stuff Grabbing, Low-Information Obama Supporters Who Put Obama In The White House—Twice, would know or care anything about things like that.

Please thank your public school teacher for making sure your children don’t learn such things, since their union is spending all that money warning everybody about Republicans disastrous plan to promote school choice and home-schooling, Support voluntary student-initiated prayer in school, and for there to be a limited role of federal government in education.

A document the National Education Association filed with the U.S. Department of Labor in 2011 indicated that the teachers union donated $100,000 to Media Matters For America nearly four years ago, describing it as a payment for “public relations costs” to ensure that NEA’s agenda made its way in the media.” Media Matters is the George Soros-funded liberal “charitable organization” dedicated to targeting mythical right-wing media bias.

Which is why our Quote for Today Committee chose FDR’s: “The process of collective bargaining, as usually understood, cannot be transplanted into the public service.” A second choice was AFL-CIO-President George Meany’s “It is impossible to bargain collectively with the government.” These days, however AFL-CIO President Richard Trumka says the only way to revive the economy would be for the government to raise everybody’s taxes, borrow more money from China, and piss it all away on projects that would benefit unions.


Coney Island Relaxes Rules for Labor Day Picnic

image011Demo-Labor Party Boss Tim Burka says to celebrate the unofficial end of another Jobless Summer during the Obama Administration (where union members have not yet adjusted to the new reality where GOP lawmakers are doing everything possible to curb their collective bargaining rights), Coney Island says it’s OK for everyone (except dumbed-down RINOs or TEA Party Members foolish enough to wander by) to put up as many signs as they want along the drive or anywhere else in the park.

No union card needed. Bring your own food or buy it at Coney.

Parking at Coney is usually an arm, and admission will cost you a leg.

American made prizes. Free Obama Phones while they last. 

Endorsed DemocRAT candidates will also be permitted to hand out self-adhesive stickers (to be placed on light poles, garbage cans, bathroom fixtures, and other structures).

Don’t worry about cleaning up afterwards. Coney Island has many sub-minimum-wage illegal immigrant workers to that kind of work.

Boehner Bashing, Class Warfare, and TEA Party name-calling will begin at 2:30 PM, but you don’t really have to get there early this year, since there will be no added security requirements for a presidential or vice presidential visit slowing admission to the picnic grounds. And it’s doubtful any mention will be made of John Kasich Taylor’s “Proclamation in Honor of Labor Day,” looks just like the one he issued last year, since most people think Ohio’s Republican Governor is probably still using one of Gayvenor Strickland’s old Labor Day Proclamations.

image013With all of the Ohio Demo-Labor Party’s 2014 State-wide races totally in the crapper, Cincinnati AFL-CIO Executive Secretary Pete McLinden told The Fishwrap flat or declining wages have been a constant for workers everywhere for years, especially in our tri-state area. All the while, CEO pay has skyrocketed, resulting in widening pay gaps and levels of inequality unseen since the onset of the Great Depression. Ohio is no exception. In fact, Innovation Ohio, a progressive think tank, recently released a study which found that Ohio now has more low-wage jobs than higher-paying jobs for the first time since 2007.

Can you imagine how long the lines to get in would be at Coney Island today if somebody there was actually offering full-time, well-paying jobs?

Despite Obama’s “historic” re-election, we still have more Americans unemployed, under-employed, or just not interested in being employed these days. Prices of gasoline are in the tri-state on Labor Day are averaging about $3.44 per-gallon. That’s about twice what they were when Obama was first elected. Fewer Americans each year are saying Labor Day is the nation’s most important holiday, and pollsters say the country disapproves of labor unions even more than last year. But it’s really hard to feel sorry for any of these people, since every one of them voted for Obama twice.

But one of the greatest things about our country is that we’re a resilient, hard-working people, and on this Labor Day weekend, we should remember these values and the things that have made our country the greatest in the world. Do you think any of our Obama Supporters in the Press will mention the irony that on this Labor Day so many people don’t have jobs? 


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How Will These Ordinary Americans Celebrate Union Day?

  • image013Mama Maruska, Retired Homemaker: Cooking for my ungrateful family like I do on every holiday.
  •  image014Porky Dorkman, Student: Getting ready to skip school tomorrow.

 

  • image017Marlene Mandible, Totally Unemployable: Paying for three seats on my airline flight.
  • image019Earl Pitts, Part-time Taxidermist: Hopin’ my kids don’t get their fingers blowed off with all those illegal fireworks I bought at the truck stop.

 

  • image021Linda Libel, Gossip Columnist:Trying to pick up on the latest hearsay about Ditzy DemocRAT Judge Tracie Hunter. 

 

  • image023Suzie Soccermom, TEA Partier: Avoiding being raped, murdered, or run over by police in downtown Cincinnati.

 

  • image024Leroy Williams, Street Corner Pharmacist: Selling crack to teenagers in Over-the-Rhine.

 

  •  image026Norma Rashid, Former TV5 Anchorwoman: Sitting home alone waiting for Charlie to call.

 

  • image027Jack Mehoff, Used Solar Panel Salesman: Eatin’ lots of brats and metts at the union picnic even though I still haven’t paid my dues.

 

  •  image029Emily Frump, Retired City Employee: Worrying about what’s going to happen to my pension.

 

  • image030CH Snitch, 1000 Main Street: Trying to find party hacks to volunteer to be poll workers for all those Hamilton County judicial candidates running unopposed.

 

  • image032Sid Schlock, Slumlord: planning on how to raise the rent on illegal aliens.

 

  • image034Ken CamBoo, Northern Kentucky Journalist: Wondering why there are so few unions in the Bluegrass State.
  • image035TEA Party Tim: Circulating Right-to-work petitions.

 

 

  • image037Reverum Calhoun, Minister: Boycottin’ the Union Day Picnic at Coney Island.

 

  • image039Seedy Diehl, Northern Kentucky: Getting another day off with pay.

 

  • image040Rashid Jones, Escort Service Provider: Tellin’ his main lady “This ain’t no holiday for you, bitch! Get out on the street and bring me my money.”

 


Whistleblower Weekend Web Poll

image041This weekend, here’s how Whistleblower Web Poll respondents said people would be spending the Union Day weekend:

(A) Honoring American workers: 2%
(B) Sitting in traffic: 2%
(C) Looking for full-time jobs: 2%
(D) Getting another day off with pay: 94%


Labor’s Lament

This weekend, everybody who doesn’t give a rat’s ass about the meaning of national holidays as long as he gets the day off, e-mailed entries to the Whistleblower Limerick Contest.

image043The winner is Edward Norton, a smelly sewer worker from Price Hill, who’s a member in good standing of Sewer Workers Local #389. Ed wins an autographed picture of former AFL-CIO Union Boss Rad Danford, a lifetime supply of deodorant, fake union labels to patch the holes in those crappy Made-in-China clothes he buys at Wal-Mart, and his choice of which arm gets broken if he complains about his dues being spent to promote tax-and-spend DemocRATS. His winning entry is:

How most people will spend Union Day,
For kids, it’s a day they can play;
But if you’re self-employed,
You might be annoyed,
When other assholes get the day off with pay.


UNION CORRUPTION HOT LINE

e-mail your requests for additional accident insurance today.

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Some anti-union items in today’s Blower were sent in by our equally anti-union subscribers, but let’s face it, we could always use more.


Whistleblower Link of the Day

Thanks, Union Bosses!

Sent In By Those Lovable Union-Busting Koch Brothers.

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image050Note: We guarantee Blackberry subscribers who don’t go home and see links and pictures on their computers are not going to appreciate all of this good stuff today.


Current Whistleblower Policies and Disclaimers can be found here

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